For more information, or to schedule an appointment, call 323 422 2036
Kinship Sessions Building a specific culture of partnership for people raising kids
These sessions are for people who are no longer together who share kids and need to operate with one another in a mutually decided working 'system' that includes each parent, their current partner, and their child.
This counseling orients and coordinates each adult’s pertinent information such as: professional schedules, obligations towards self and friends, preferred use of free time, most frequently occupied geographical locations (east side vs west side). Once specifics are determined and known by each adult, the objective is for each parent and partner to be able to coordinate with kin (each parent and partner), so each may enjoy the reliability of this larger system that supports all involved. The goal is to informatively parent the child with comfort due to the collective nature of parenting
Sessions typically occur with 3 adults: one single parent and one coupled parent 4 adults: each parent with current their partner.
Biological parents and their current partners meet together, up to three consecutive sessions in my office to discuss and assemble this ‘system.’ Collectively, we discuss the equity of each individual as mentioned above so as to serve the needs of the whole.
HOW: Session One/Step One 1) Each parent brings their custody agreement (if legally separating or divorced), in addition, to sharing what a typical weekly schedule looks like (first) without their child. What are your obligations and desires without anyone else in the mix?
Session Two/Step Two 2) Each adult shares the desired goals about themself and their partner only, in the greater system. With the structure that will be in place what will this permit for you?
Session Three/Step Three 3) Each adult shares their expectations about the entire system of self, partner, and child; as well as, the other biological parent, their partner and the child. Now that we know who is where in conjunction with their needs we stitch the kinship together around the child.
We negotiate and implement agreements. Each person verbally outlines their hopes and needs for how all adults and the child will interact as a whole. It ultimately boils down into agreed upon parameters and roles.
These discussions also incorporate atypical exceptions. For example, one parent must leave to go on tour or location.
This is not custody mediation and does not determine anything of a legal nature. These sessions only meet one to three times to establish the agreed upon intended structure of the individual in the whole. ‘Tune-ups’ are permitted as needed. The goal is to unify in kinship for all involved. These sessions do not support or tolerate one’s aim to oppose, or to deliver retribution, or to establish ownership. This work is interested in collective goal setting, mutual respect and self respect. Let’s be 21st century people, shall we?
Children and teenagers do not attend these sessions
NOTE: This modality is not recommended for co-parents who communicate through high-conflict. It is intended for higher functioning adults who wish for their child, their partners, and for themselves to practice healthy relational negotiations that result in positive outcomes for all involved. - Fictive Kinship is based on social agreements such as friendship instead of adoption, blood (consanguinity), or marriage (affinity) that creates a relationship like family.
Kristin F Jones, Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist #92360 3611 Seneca Avenue, Los Angeles, CA 90039